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Old 07-17-2009, 01:21 AM   #1
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Default Bi-sexuality

I think that to celebrate RB being back up and running, I will honor the board with yet another ChiTown complaint thread.

Ok...its not really complaining, but I've been going through a quarterlife crisis, kinda like a midlife crisis, but it happens in your 20's...its really strange. I have a general feeling of not being ok, I feel unfullfilled, disappointed, confused, frustrated, and angry. I have a nervous, almost helpless feeling- Like I'm getting OLD and running out of time to feel good. I stay up some nights feeling like this. I snap at people and I just dont feel ok. My mind is being pulled in a dozen different directions. I change my mind, maybe I want this, no I dont, I want this. I have NO idea what the hell I want in any aspect of my life. I looked it up and it seems these feelings fall under the category of someone going through a quarterlife crisis, but the definition is that it happens to recent college grads after they enter the real world and have to pay bills...and I was like hmmmm...well I know my ass doesnt pay any bills, so maybe I'm going through menopause or something.

Anyhow....

So...I called my best friend up and told her whats up. I actually have considered going back to my ex boyfriend so I can marry and reproduce and do all that good stuff that I feel I have to do. It doesnt even matter to me if I dont love him or am not sexually attracted to him, because nowadays I dont even believe in love. She says something like "oh dont worry about him, its over with him. You will find someone else, just wait and see." I told her I didnt know if the time came if I would want that.

She got all serious and told me about her cousin who after a few years of an unhappy marriage, decided she liked girls. She told me that she thought that of me. Or she said it nicely...that that was "an option."

The funny thing is that she isnt the first person to tell me that So maybe I should open myself up...but to girls. I never thought I was bi or anything, I dont think I am really attracted to girls, but my mind is so screwed up I just might try it. Maybe this is the reason why I havent evolved enough as a human being. What does everyone think?
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Old 07-17-2009, 01:41 AM   #2
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i think that, while you should be willing to question and examine yourself, fromwhat i know of you, you are a pretty straight woman with some shitty experience with guys. you just need to lower your visual standards a little and go for the guys that give a shit, even if they arent one of the "hotties".
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Old 07-17-2009, 02:33 AM   #3
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Go for it Chi, but make sure you video it and post it here....
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Old 07-17-2009, 09:08 AM   #4
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I think its great to experiment, after all you dont know until you try it right?? so long as the person you kiss wont be offended if you realise its not for u! I dont know what I consider myself as.... I used to have "nightmares" getting withgirls as a teen, but therse days find myself realllllllyyyy attracted to certain types of women and wouldnt hesitate getting with one of them if it came about, but that said i dont chase encounters with women with the same rigor as I would men. I think there are many shades of bisexuality in there, if your even questioning it then it might be worth looking at, dont know about doing that with a mate though it might get ugly! I would * never * kiss my bff!! lol variety si the spice of life. it may not be for you but at least you would never have to wonder if your missing out on anything!
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Old 07-17-2009, 09:37 AM   #5
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Originally Posted by ChiTownHoney View Post
The funny thing is that she isnt the first person to tell me that So maybe I should open myself up...but to girls. I never thought I was bi or anything, I dont think I am really attracted to girls, but my mind is so screwed up I just might try it. Maybe this is the reason why I havent evolved enough as a human being. What does everyone think?
Definitely! Try it and tell us then. Maybe you'll be surprised
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Old 07-17-2009, 05:26 PM   #6
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i think that, while you should be willing to question and examine yourself, fromwhat i know of you, you are a pretty straight woman with some shitty experience with guys. you just need to lower your visual standards a little and go for the guys that give a shit, even if they arent one of the "hotties".
I always felt like I was straight but now I'm not sure. And about lowering my visual standards...do you have a chip that can somehow be implanted into your brain to make you forget about attractive guys and suddenly become attracted to butt-ugly guys? If so, can you UPS it? Overnight air would be great.

I dont even know how to attract women. With guys, I just dress in my best and look all hot and act uninterested. Would that work? or do I actually have to try?

Quote:
Originally Posted by gaggirl View Post
I think its great to experiment, after all you dont know until you try it right?? so long as the person you kiss wont be offended if you realise its not for u! I dont know what I consider myself as.... I used to have "nightmares" getting withgirls as a teen, but therse days find myself realllllllyyyy attracted to certain types of women and wouldnt hesitate getting with one of them if it came about, but that said i dont chase encounters with women with the same rigor as I would men. I think there are many shades of bisexuality in there, if your even questioning it then it might be worth looking at, dont know about doing that with a mate though it might get ugly! I would * never * kiss my bff!! lol variety si the spice of life. it may not be for you but at least you would never have to wonder if your missing out on anything!
I've kissed my friends...just pecks though, I dont think I can every REALLLY mess with another girl...You know I took my friends comment so seriously is because I am just not into guys right now. I mean, I objectify them. I like to look at their muscles and say ooh lala, but thats where it ends. I dont want them to talk to me. Even now, I've texting with a couple guys who are trying to talk with me. One is younger and very sexy, nice body....the other is a 40 something year old guy who has alot of money. I'm not even trying to talk to them...I would rather they left me alone. Just not interested. Could my lack of disinterest be that I'm not attracted to men? I dont know... I've been hit on alot since my relationship ended 7 months ago but I'm just not interested.

Also, I've never fully enjoyed sex. Is that a problem?

Last edited by ChiTownHoney; 07-17-2009 at 05:41 PM.
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Old 07-17-2009, 05:30 PM   #7
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The answer to all your questions is beer.
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Yay! It's pink!

Don't think.... FEEL!

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Old 07-17-2009, 08:26 PM   #8
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The answer to all your questions is beer.
No, it's vodka. Beer takes too long.
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Old 07-18-2009, 12:07 AM   #9
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Alchohol is the root of evil fellas, all the regretful stuff and guys I have done were all while intoxicated.

Anyways...why the hell am I kidding myself? I'm not bi. I'm crazy about men, seriously. There is this one guy who is soooooo hot I mean, seriously hot..muscles and everything RAWR..damn. Anyways....I see right through him. Complete player. I have dealt with his type before many times. But he is my absolute weakness. Anyhow I saw him and he asked me if I wanted to go out tonight and you have no idea how hard it was for me to tell him no. He's so sexy.. I had to tell him no. I smiled and said I couldnt go because such and such...even though guess what I'm doing right now?? Haha I'm on RB telling you how much I wanted to go out with him. But I have the power. Tomorrow...he will be texting me. This is the third time I've turned him down, yet I give sublte green lights to keep him coming back for more. Its so good to have some self control. I'm not rusty, I'm a pro. I can play the player. I'm a player magnet.

I'm surprised nobody really posts in my threads. Am I that boring? I was going to something boring as a title, but I thought this would catch more attention. if I had put "My mini-crisis" like I planned, nobody would have looked at it.

ANYHOW. Should I try a girl anyways...just for fun? I would have to do some searching though, maybe online. I dont know.

By the way....Do you think that all good looking guy over the age of 23 or so are bad news? If not, why does everyone insist not to go for the good looking guys?

The only thing is I objectify guys now, as I only want them for their bodies and how good they look or what they have. I dont want a relationship because love is not real. At least not with a man it isnt. I guess you can say I am very physically attractred to men, but not emotionally anymore. And I'm not physically attracted to women, but emotionally I might be...however, I have best girl friends for that.

Last edited by ChiTownHoney; 07-18-2009 at 12:53 AM.
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Old 07-18-2009, 02:29 AM   #10
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I believe people are either straight or gay. Bisexualism, particularly for the women, to me, spells attention whore. Those females are looking for approval and attention much like those tabloids that put out vague and misleading wordings to stretch out an idea or speculation.

Katy Perry
Britney Spears/Madonna

...and other college drunk girls around the United States and the world...
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Old 07-18-2009, 02:48 AM   #11
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ChiTownHoney View Post
Alchohol is the root of evil fellas, all the regretful stuff and guys I have done were all while intoxicated.

Anyways...why the hell am I kidding myself? I'm not bi. I'm crazy about men, seriously. There is this one guy who is soooooo hot I mean, seriously hot..muscles and everything RAWR..damn. Anyways....I see right through him. Complete player. I have dealt with his type before many times. But he is my absolute weakness. Anyhow I saw him and he asked me if I wanted to go out tonight and you have no idea how hard it was for me to tell him no. He's so sexy.. I had to tell him no. I smiled and said I couldnt go because such and such...even though guess what I'm doing right now?? Haha I'm on RB telling you how much I wanted to go out with him. But I have the power. Tomorrow...he will be texting me. This is the third time I've turned him down, yet I give sublte green lights to keep him coming back for more. Its so good to have some self control. I'm not rusty, I'm a pro. I can play the player. I'm a player magnet.

I'm surprised nobody really posts in my threads. Am I that boring? I was going to something boring as a title, but I thought this would catch more attention. if I had put "My mini-crisis" like I planned, nobody would have looked at it.

ANYHOW. Should I try a girl anyways...just for fun? I would have to do some searching though, maybe online. I dont know.

By the way....Do you think that all good looking guy over the age of 23 or so are bad news? If not, why does everyone insist not to go for the good looking guys?

The only thing is I objectify guys now, as I only want them for their bodies and how good they look or what they have. I dont want a relationship because love is not real. At least not with a man it isnt. I guess you can say I am very physically attractred to men, but not emotionally anymore. And I'm not physically attracted to women, but emotionally I might be...however, I have best girl friends for that.
Jeez Chi, there are guys out there who would give their life for you. Have a bit of faith, please.
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Old 07-18-2009, 02:52 AM   #12
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Jeez Chi, there are guys out there who would give their life for you. Have a bit of faith, please.
If you know Chi, she does not care if there are guys that would give up their life for her. That's being too nice and by default, is rejected. This isn't meant to point out at her specifically, but many women feel the same way. Sometimes, there are no rooms available for heroes.

Her standards do not allow romance, but shallow encounters, as indicated in the above post. Appearance is slightly more important to her than anything else; it's just her preference.
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Old 07-18-2009, 02:52 AM   #13
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Originally Posted by ChiTownHoney View Post
ANYHOW. Should I try a girl anyways...just for fun? I would have to do some searching though, maybe online. I dont know.
Fuck it, why not? I mean, if you're not at all attracted to women, then why fuck with it? But if you have even a minor twinge of attraction for women, and you're feeling frisky, why not?...Seems like it'd be easier to get drunk and fool around with an acquaintance, but, that might have lingering consequences, so, online might be the best route.


Quote:
Originally Posted by ChiTownHoney View Post
By the way....Do you think that all good looking guy over the age of 23 or so are bad news? If not, why does everyone insist not to go for the good looking guys?
I don't think there's a problem with good looking guys of any age, i think if i were a girl, my only red flag would be guys who are just too smooth. If he comes across as too smooth and suave, i'd probably peg him as a guy who's been around and figured it out to a science what's worked, and is now a pro and hittin' and quittin'. I don't think being attractive and over 23 is an excluder though.


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I believe people are either straight or gay. Bisexualism, particularly for the women, to me, spells attention whore.
i do often share this philosophy on bisexuality in females, the idea of it solely being for attention. If you're drunk and mention that you're 'bi' and then are cheered into making out with a girl, that doesn't count as 'bi' to me...But, i do see sexuality as being on a spectrum, and a person could be dead in the middle, equally attracted to both. I think bi is a hard term to define as you could find yourself falling anywhere on that spectrum, and who's to say where the lines are for bi, straight, and gay?

I catch shit for friends sometimes, for being able to call a guy hot, but, fuck, if he's a good looking guy, i can tell, and i think it would be phony bullshit masculinity to act like i couldn't see that a guy is attractive...

I guess that was just a point of a spectrum of sexuality, i'm straight, but, i'm willing to admit when a guys hot, which puts me closer to the gay end of the spectrum, than a guy who genuinely can't even look at other men in that light.
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Old 07-18-2009, 02:58 AM   #14
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Fuck it, why not? I mean, if you're not at all attracted to women, then why fuck with it? But if you have even a minor twinge of attraction for women, and you're feeling frisky, why not?...Seems like it'd be easier to get drunk and fool around with an acquaintance, but, that might have lingering consequences, so, online might be the best route.



I don't think there's a problem with good looking guys of any age, i think if i were a girl, my only red flag would be guys who are just too smooth. If he comes across as too smooth and suave, i'd probably peg him as a guy who's been around and figured it out to a science what's worked, and is now a pro and hittin' and quittin'. I don't think being attractive and over 23 is an excluder though.



i do often share this philosophy on bisexuality in females, the idea of it solely being for attention. If you're drunk and mention that you're 'bi' and then are cheered into making out with a girl, that doesn't count as 'bi' to me...But, i do see sexuality as being on a spectrum, and a person could be dead in the middle, equally attracted to both. I think bi is a hard term to define as you could find yourself falling anywhere on that spectrum, and who's to say where the lines are for bi, straight, and gay?

I catch shit for friends sometimes, for being able to call a guy hot, but, fuck, if he's a good looking guy, i can tell, and i think it would be phony bullshit masculinity to act like i couldn't see that a guy is attractive...

I guess that was just a point of a spectrum of sexuality, i'm straight, but, i'm willing to admit when a guys hot, which puts me closer to the gay end of the spectrum, than a guy who genuinely can't even look at other men in that light.
About the last part of your post: They say that you can have complete confirmation of your heterosexuality by being able to man up and declare when a guy is hot or not. It doesn't make you gay if you're not actually into it. You're just praising his looks.
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Old 07-18-2009, 03:08 AM   #15
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well, my argument, is kind of the opposite of that, i do think there are guys out there who for whatever reason (insecurity, way they were raised, just how they are) really can't even look at a guy and think of them as attractive or unattractive.

I think i fall more on the gay spectrum than a person like that.

I think saying that a guy is hot is you essentially saying, he's attractive (even to you on some level), something about the guy is attractive and you're saying, that something about that guys look draws you in.

I think being able to acknowledge it might show that you're more confident, but, not more straight.
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Old 07-18-2009, 03:12 AM   #16
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If you know Chi, she does not care if there are guys that would give up their life for her. That's being too nice and by default, is rejected. This isn't meant to point out at her specifically, but many women feel the same way. Sometimes, there are no rooms available for heroes.

Her standards do not allow romance, but shallow encounters, as indicated in the above post. Appearance is slightly more important to her than anything else; it's just her preference.
I have to hope it's just a matter of bad choices. She's good at that obviously but like anyone she is as person. There is someone out there for her. Hopefully she'll get over her crap and see it.
No offense Chi.
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Old 07-18-2009, 05:23 PM   #17
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I believe people are either straight or gay. Bisexualism, particularly for the women, to me, spells attention whore. Those females are looking for approval and attention much like those tabloids that put out vague and misleading wordings to stretch out an idea or speculation.

Katy Perry
Britney Spears/Madonna

...and other college drunk girls around the United States and the world...
Yeeeeeeeeeessssssssssss........<shakes head here we go again>

AW, do yourself a favour and stop making generalisations will ya, it just shows your lack of maturity...and look what happened with your 'all women are whores' comment..OK?

Just because you are not something, doesn't mean that nobody is. I can't understand why a man wants to bed a man, especially when you have the likes of Chi, Secret, Sierra, CrimsonExtremelyLongNewScreenName and all the other lovely ladies about, but you know what, I don't have to. The same with why people choose both, they just do, though I can understand why a woman would look at one the afore mentioned hot ladies and go

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Old 07-18-2009, 05:31 PM   #18
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Alchohol is the root of evil fellas, all the regretful stuff and guys I have done were all while intoxicated.
right, okay fellas, lets go to Chi's house with a few bottles of booze, who's with me

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Originally Posted by ChiTownHoney View Post
I'm surprised nobody really posts in my threads. Am I that boring? I was going to something boring as a title, but I thought this would catch more attention. if I had put "My mini-crisis" like I planned, nobody would have looked at it.
Well, lots have posted, I only haven't because, a) I didn't have anything to add, and b) someone (not Chi I want to add) neg repped me last time...

If you are not bi, even only bi-curious, then it is not something that I think you should just go out and try.
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Old 07-19-2009, 07:57 PM   #19
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Yeeeeeeeeeessssssssssss........<shakes head here we go again>

AW, do yourself a favour and stop making generalisations will ya, it just shows your lack of maturity...and look what happened with your 'all women are whores' comment..OK?

Just because you are not something, doesn't mean that nobody is. I can't understand why a man wants to bed a man, especially when you have the likes of Chi, Secret, Sierra, CrimsonExtremelyLongNewScreenName and all the other lovely ladies about, but you know what, I don't have to. The same with why people choose both, they just do, though I can understand why a woman would look at one the afore mentioned hot ladies and go
I have long refrained from making those kinds of comments. Enough members have heard enough and they understand where I'm coming from. They don't have to agree, and I'm certainly not fetching for their approval or sympathy because none of that can ever change me back.

In my life, I have had the "luxury" of being around the worst of women so my observations will undoubtedly be reflected in my writings. Why it's the case, I won't disclose but rest assured, the women I am mentioning about are NOT from this forum. So it is a lack of maturity? No, I don't believe so.

But hey, Pervi, thanks for calling me out and not Chitown. She always gets a free pass at generalizations and well, you know, "that's just Chi".

No offense to Chitown but this is a silly thread. She already knows she's attracted to males, and just because she has a little trouble in the dating world with men, what makes her think she'll be more compatible with women?

If I could offer comments about her, as I have done so before, IMHO, her friends are the reasons why she's not doing as well as she could be. She's not THAT bad of a person, but because there's always that "reinforcing support" that is found with her, shall we say, high school-esque girlfriends, I think it leads her to avoid guys that would not gain the approval of her friends. Chi has said her friends are stuck-up but other than that, I could be completely wrong about it. I am only throwing this out for discussion.

Her friends, actually, may be involved in a little of bisexualism, but not because that's how they feel, but more so for approval. I really can't stand people like that.

Last edited by AWDracer; 07-19-2009 at 08:09 PM.
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Old 07-19-2009, 08:46 PM   #20
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I have long refrained from making those kinds of comments. Enough members have heard enough and they understand where I'm coming from. They don't have to agree, and I'm certainly not fetching for their approval or sympathy because none of that can ever change me back.

In my life, I have had the "luxury" of being around the worst of women so my observations will undoubtedly be reflected in my writings. Why it's the case, I won't disclose but rest assured, the women I am mentioning about are NOT from this forum. So it is a lack of maturity? No, I don't believe so.

But hey, Pervi, thanks for calling me out and not Chitown. She always gets a free pass at generalizations and well, you know, "that's just Chi".
I can't speak to Chi's 'generalizations' as i don't really notice when anyone generalizes about the other sex, just not something i really care about, but, AWD does get jumped on quick as hell anytime he makes one. I think he's last statement while yes was a generalization, and let me throw one out myself, i believe ALOT (not all) of the time (especially with younger girls) it is correct.

He said 'particularly' with women, and i don't think anyone can argue that there are more women in bars and parties who do have 'bi' tendencies that are exacerbated by the fact that it brings them extra male attention. As opposed to guys doing it for...i don't know what kind of attention they would be doing it for, as it's certainly not attracting girls.

additionally, this is a rapeboard, and i think there are probably plenty of male members on here who genuinely hate women, they're just not as vocal about it. Not saying that makes it right, just saying i doubt AWD is in that big of a minority here.

I know AWD has made some inappropriate generalizations in the past, i just don't think this was one of them.
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