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10-23-2012, 04:32 AM | #1 |
Privileged Member
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: One Foot In The Grave
Posts: 1,376
Reputation: 121541 |
An Obituary to share with you.
I found this in the 'Times' of London newspaper and thought I would share it with you. It's fucking brilliant.
"Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape. He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as: - Knowing when to come in out of the rain; - Why the early bird gets the worm; - Life isn't always fair; - and maybe it was my fault. Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you can earn) and reliable strategies (adults, not children, are in charge). His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a 6-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition. Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly children. It declined even further when schools were required to get parental consent to administer sun lotion or an aspirin to a student; but could not inform parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion. Common Sense lost the will to live as the churches became businesses; and criminals received better treatment than their victims. Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar could sue you for assault. Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement. "Common Sense was preceded in death, by his parents, Truth and Trust, by his wife, Discretion, by his daughter, Responsibility, and by his son, Reason. He is survived by his 4 stepbrothers; -I Know My Rights -I Want It Now -Someone Else Is To Blame -I'm A Victim Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone. If you still remember him, pass this on. If not, join the majority and do nothing." PASS IT ON.
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You have the right to remain tied to the bed. Anything you may try to say will be ignored. Last edited by batffink; 10-23-2012 at 04:35 AM. |
10-23-2012, 04:00 PM | #2 |
Privileged Member
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Nice find battfink.
Sometimes it would appear that over time we have become smarter as a race, though the opposite is true. It seems that technology makes us a more advanced civilization allowing us to communicate across the planet instantly and travel around the world in a relatively short period of time. Though, the same things that were made to make life easier has inevitably lowered our natural intelligence and memory, such as spell check/auto correct and cell phones with there address books. There could be a correlation between the negative effects that technology has on us and the loss of common sense. Some of the things outlined in the article I know of through first hand experience and I find myself perplexed at how stupid the powers that be are, since they are the ones who put the rules and laws in to place. It is truly beyond me the depths of stupidity that is prevalent on this planet these day, however I have to deal with it and roll with it, because its a reality. A sad reality, though still a reality.
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The clandestine fantasies
of the profound transcendent recondite person that I am, I will elucidate to my fellow pervs in a portentous Tao while we cogitate the quintessential elements of rape in a hedonistic world |
10-28-2012, 10:59 AM | #3 |
The Fist of Fury.
Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: Entering the....
Posts: 9,649
Reputation: 118903 |
Common sense realised a slight revival when the electorate of London booted out Red Ken, and kept him booted out! Common Sense would rise from the dead if we fuck him off to Scotland along with the rest of the Scottish Labour Mafia and give them their "independance".
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Fist is a four letter word. So is fist, fist, fist, fist, fist, fist fist, fist, fist, fist, fist, and, well you get the fist-fucking picture.... THE WESTCOUNTRY SHALL RISE AGAIN! Yay! It's pink! Don't think.... FEEL! We're Englishmen, and we came here, to rape your women and drink your beer. I went back in time and voted for Hitler. Pouring oil on troubled waters since 2008. Then lighting a fucking match.
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11-25-2012, 09:41 PM | #4 |
It's been fun
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Sounds like something from V for vendetta.
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I have a brontosaurus and you don't. So there. |
12-02-2012, 08:59 AM | #5 |
Junior Member
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Salerno (Italy)
Posts: 6
Reputation: 10 |
ok
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