My rape thoughts - Rape Board

ChiTownHoney · 06-23-2008, 05:01 PM

Just wanted to share some thoughts on something I realized about myself. I dont have rape fantasies often, or even a fair amount of the time. I dont even remember the last one I had. And I can probably count on my fingers how many really good ones I have ever had. I do have them, so dont get me wrong. However, I love the concept of rape the thought/possibility of being raped. Do I really belong on this site?

I always thought I liked rape because the good girl in me is not allowed to have sex. That may be a part of it too, but to be honest, there is probably something more.

I was working late the other day and everyone went home. I was maybe in the office till about 9 o'clock and there was a knock on the door and it was a delivery driver, he had to come in and drop some stuff off. He wasnt terribly sexy or anything, and I was annoyed that he even bothered me. I also I felt it was odd to get a drop off so late in the evening, it just seemed off and didnt sit right with me. But I opened the door for him, and turned my back to him to walk away and he followed me in. I felt such a strong presence from him behind me and a wave of fear came over me. I just got afraid all of a sudden, realizing I was all alone with this guy. I hoped nothing would happen, but I almost wanted it to, it was almost conflicting...Yes I would like it, no I dont want it.....

The FEAR that feeling caused. The unknowing-intuitive-somethings not right-unsettling-uncomfortable feeling is the BIGGEST aphrodisiac. And no fantasy can cause that....

I consider myself fairly good looking and am a small girl. I thought about what if he thought to himself that this is an opportunity and nobody was even around to stop him. He of course didnt do anything....much to either my relief or dismay...I'm not sure. and I am wondering...maybe its something I want. Again, I was not attracted to this guy...but something in me wanted to be violated for real, and this really disturbs me.

But to me, that little fleeting moment of possibilities in a real life (imagined?) predicament is SOOO much more enticing than any little fantasy I could conjure up in my mind.

So I dont know what category that leaves me here in the muck of perversion. Any thoughts are appreciated.

older and wiser · 06-23-2008, 05:08 PM

Interesting and perfectly natural thoughts, but just wondering what you were having delivered?

ChiTownHoney · 06-23-2008, 11:41 PM

I have no idea what it was. It could have been a 15 inch dildo for all I know, i didnt open the package.

Thank you for contributing!!

dashrendar44 · 06-23-2008, 11:46 PM

i think that you might not be so much into rape in specific, but the adrenaline it causes, since your also into things like MMA fighting. rape is simply a sexual link to adrenaline, and therefore fits your attraction well

shysnale · 06-24-2008, 03:42 AM

There might be comprimises for you Chi.
Go to Kinky clubs, where the dance floor is full of people, dance a little slutty and maybe five or six guys will voluntarily press on you like a lemon. Nothing too bad will happen to you because you will be in a big club with security staff but at least you'll have a taste of what it feels like when it goes a little too far.

Renegade · 06-24-2008, 10:49 AM

Well in addition to the "sex without guilt" feelings a rape fantasy provide, you've also discovered that you have a natural desire to be "forced to submit" that is equally strong. The yearnings to submit to a powerful man have deep evolutionary roots that (for some women) can not be sanatized by 21st century political correctness.

The question I have though is - thinking back on it - do you now wish he had grabbed you? Have you touched yourself thinking about it? And knowing that you were one step closer to reality - did you climax faster? harder?

italianguy · 06-24-2008, 12:49 PM

ChiTownHoney it's not a very good idea to write that here, someone could misread this as a request to be raped for real.

And why are you deleting some of your old posts?

MARADONA · 06-24-2008, 01:53 PM

Sometimes it's hard to explain in words what is going in our heads....really hard!

JohnnyReb · 06-24-2008, 03:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by italianguy

ChiTownHoney it's not a very good idea to write that here, someone could misread this as a request to be raped for real.

Well only someone who was both an utter moron and unable to comprehend basic English.

MARADONA · 06-24-2008, 03:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JohnnyReb

Well only someone who was both an utter moron and unable to comprehend basic English.

eh eh yeah

ChiTownHoney · 06-24-2008, 08:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by italianguy

ChiTownHoney it's not a very good idea to write that here, someone could misread this as a request to be raped for real.

And why are you deleting some of your old posts?

Read it as you will.

I deleted a whole months of posts because nobody appreciates them or what I have to contribute to the board. I am slowly trying not to post, but there is just so much good shit here, I cant pass it up.

italianguy · 06-24-2008, 08:59 PM

double post

italianguy · 06-24-2008, 09:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ChiTownHoney

Read it as you will.

I deleted a whole months of posts because nobody appreciates them or what I have to contribute to the board. I am slowly trying not to post, but there is just so much good shit here, I cant pass it up.

What?? You are the best member of this board, I can't believe that. I enjoy very much reading you.

Who are the envious bitches trying to kick you out? Do I have to teach them a respect lesson?

ChiTownHoney · 06-24-2008, 08:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Renegade

The question I have though is - thinking back on it - do you now wish he had grabbed you? Have you touched yourself thinking about it? And knowing that you were one step closer to reality - did you climax faster? harder?

No I havent done any of that. Like I said I am confused...I dont know if I would have wanted it or not. I get goosebumps thinking about it though and want it to happen again.

What you said about having a desire to submit makes perfect sense. maybe its just that...maybe I'm not such a freak.

ChiTownHoney · 06-27-2008, 05:43 PM

WOW Cryptic, this is very brave of you for sharing and really opens up my eyes! I feel we have some stuff in common, and I do understand your feelings in a way, yet cant understand completely. because I didnt experience what you went through.

The closest I can come is that incident I told you about with the crack head, and also in high school I was sexually harrassed by a guy. I was afraid to death of seeing him and afraid to go to school, I felt lowly, depressed because of what was happening. I didnt like it, but I am sure if I was attracted to the guy than I would like it.

Weird that that guy who did all those things to me is GAY now. seriously. How the hell does that make any sense?

I bet if the fantasies features a man that the woman is attracted too, ALL women could have rape fantasies.

Your post really opened up my eyes and makes me understand a bit more. Thank you very much for answering the questions, as I am sure it was hard for you.

italianguy · 06-27-2008, 09:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ChiTownHoney

Your post really opened up my eyes and makes me understand a bit more. Thank you very much for answering the questions, as I am sure it was hard for you.

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO You made a vanilla out of her.

touriquet2001 · 06-27-2008, 10:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by italianguy

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO You made a vanilla out of her.

i don't find cryptic's sharing her experience funny . that was really uncalled for . you really are clueless , aren't you ?

JohnnyReb · 06-27-2008, 11:13 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by touriquet2001

i don't find cryptic's sharing her experience funny . that was really uncalled for . you really are clueless , aren't you ?

Yes, yes he is!

ChiTownHoney · 06-28-2008, 11:31 AM

No it hasnt...I will always want it probably untill I get it and wish I hadnt gotten it.

Sad to say.

There may be some deep reason why I do want it, and think I will have to have intensive therapy before I can find out what that is.

06-23-2008, 05:01 PM	#1
ChiTownHoney Pa'l Mundo Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: ObamaNation Posts: 2,460 Reputation: 33436	My rape thoughts Just wanted to share some thoughts on something I realized about myself. I dont have rape fantasies often, or even a fair amount of the time. I dont even remember the last one I had. And I can probably count on my fingers how many really good ones I have ever had. I do have them, so dont get me wrong. However, I love the concept of rape the thought/possibility of being raped. Do I really belong on this site? I always thought I liked rape because the good girl in me is not allowed to have sex. That may be a part of it too, but to be honest, there is probably something more. I was working late the other day and everyone went home. I was maybe in the office till about 9 o'clock and there was a knock on the door and it was a delivery driver, he had to come in and drop some stuff off. He wasnt terribly sexy or anything, and I was annoyed that he even bothered me. I also I felt it was odd to get a drop off so late in the evening, it just seemed off and didnt sit right with me. But I opened the door for him, and turned my back to him to walk away and he followed me in. I felt such a strong presence from him behind me and a wave of fear came over me. I just got afraid all of a sudden, realizing I was all alone with this guy. I hoped nothing would happen, but I almost wanted it to, it was almost conflicting...Yes I would like it, no I dont want it..... The FEAR that feeling caused. The unknowing-intuitive-somethings not right-unsettling-uncomfortable feeling is the BIGGEST aphrodisiac. And no fantasy can cause that.... I consider myself fairly good looking and am a small girl. I thought about what if he thought to himself that this is an opportunity and nobody was even around to stop him. He of course didnt do anything....much to either my relief or dismay...I'm not sure. and I am wondering...maybe its something I want. Again, I was not attracted to this guy...but something in me wanted to be violated for real, and this really disturbs me. But to me, that little fleeting moment of possibilities in a real life (imagined?) predicament is SOOO much more enticing than any little fantasy I could conjure up in my mind. So I dont know what category that leaves me here in the muck of perversion. Any thoughts are appreciated. Last edited by ChiTownHoney; 06-23-2008 at 05:53 PM.

06-23-2008, 11:41 PM	#3
ChiTownHoney Pa'l Mundo Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: ObamaNation Posts: 2,460 Reputation: 33436	I have no idea what it was. It could have been a 15 inch dildo for all I know, i didnt open the package. Thank you for contributing!! Last edited by ChiTownHoney; 06-24-2008 at 12:07 AM.

06-23-2008, 11:46 PM	#4
dashrendar44 Kamina Join Date: Dec 2006 Location: Deep In The African Jungles Of China Posts: 2,733 Reputation: 12819	i think that you might not be so much into rape in specific, but the adrenaline it causes, since your also into things like MMA fighting. rape is simply a sexual link to adrenaline, and therefore fits your attraction well __________________ "Go beyond the impossible and kick reason to the curb!" ~ Kamina, Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann "I've been thinking with my gut since I was 14, and I've come to the conclusion that my guts have shit for brains." ~ Rob Gordon, High Fidelity "All men are potential rapists. ALL MEN. Even the pope!" ~ Shirley Valentine "When you're pushed, killing's as easy as breathing." ~ John Rambo, Rambo IV "I don't think I'm easy to talk about. I've got a very irregular head. And I'm not anything that you think I am anyway." ~ Syd Barrett, Rolling Stone, December 1971

06-24-2008, 12:49 PM	#7
italianguy Banned Join Date: Oct 2007 Posts: 126 Reputation: -972	ChiTownHoney it's not a very good idea to write that here, someone could misread this as a request to be raped for real. And why are you deleting some of your old posts? Last edited by italianguy; 06-24-2008 at 01:08 PM.

06-24-2008, 08:59 PM	#12
italianguy Banned Join Date: Oct 2007 Posts: 126 Reputation: -972	double post Last edited by italianguy; 06-24-2008 at 09:01 PM. Reason: double post

06-23-2008, 05:08 PM	#2
older and wiser Privileged Member Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: England Posts: 297 Reputation: 1024	Interesting and perfectly natural thoughts, but just wondering what you were having delivered?

06-24-2008, 03:42 AM	#5
shysnale Neurotic Escargot Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: Poker Table Posts: 2,754 Reputation: 13179	There might be comprimises for you Chi. Go to Kinky clubs, where the dance floor is full of people, dance a little slutty and maybe five or six guys will voluntarily press on you like a lemon. Nothing too bad will happen to you because you will be in a big club with security staff but at least you'll have a taste of what it feels like when it goes a little too far.

06-24-2008, 10:49 AM	#6
Renegade Banned Join Date: Apr 2007 Posts: 218 Reputation: 3800	Well in addition to the "sex without guilt" feelings a rape fantasy provide, you've also discovered that you have a natural desire to be "forced to submit" that is equally strong. The yearnings to submit to a powerful man have deep evolutionary roots that (for some women) can not be sanatized by 21st century political correctness. The question I have though is - thinking back on it - do you now wish he had grabbed you? Have you touched yourself thinking about it? And knowing that you were one step closer to reality - did you climax faster? harder?

06-24-2008, 01:53 PM	#8
MARADONA Banned Join Date: Nov 2007 Location: Land of the Lost Posts: 1,838 Reputation: 40272	Sometimes it's hard to explain in words what is going in our heads....really hard!

06-27-2008, 05:43 PM	#15
ChiTownHoney Pa'l Mundo Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: ObamaNation Posts: 2,460 Reputation: 33436	WOW Cryptic, this is very brave of you for sharing and really opens up my eyes! I feel we have some stuff in common, and I do understand your feelings in a way, yet cant understand completely. because I didnt experience what you went through. The closest I can come is that incident I told you about with the crack head, and also in high school I was sexually harrassed by a guy. I was afraid to death of seeing him and afraid to go to school, I felt lowly, depressed because of what was happening. I didnt like it, but I am sure if I was attracted to the guy than I would like it. Weird that that guy who did all those things to me is GAY now. seriously. How the hell does that make any sense? I bet if the fantasies features a man that the woman is attracted too, ALL women could have rape fantasies. Your post really opened up my eyes and makes me understand a bit more. Thank you very much for answering the questions, as I am sure it was hard for you. Last edited by ChiTownHoney; 06-27-2008 at 05:46 PM.

06-28-2008, 11:31 AM	#19
ChiTownHoney Pa'l Mundo Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: ObamaNation Posts: 2,460 Reputation: 33436	No it hasnt...I will always want it probably untill I get it and wish I hadnt gotten it. Sad to say. There may be some deep reason why I do want it, and think I will have to have intensive therapy before I can find out what that is.