Who Are You?

[Stainless Steel Rat]

Special Note: This is being placed in Idle Talk for the express purpose of keeping needless fighting from erupting in it, if you start a fight here the mods just might take action. You may reply to this thread or not, but everyone should at least ponder the question.

So what happened? It seems every thread these days becomes a flash point for a fight. Are we truly that disfunctional as individuals and a group that we are embracing an "us against them" mentality here within the confines of what should be a relatively peaceful forum?

So who are you?

A Prima Donna?
A Drama Queen?
An Elitist?
An Instigator?
A Martyr?
A Bully?
A Troll?
A Fraud?
A Friend?
A Foe?
A Spammer?
A Con Artist?
A Lover?
A Fighter?
An Asset?
A Liability?
A Leader?
A Follower?
A Healer?
A Peacemaker?

Are you any of these things, are you all of these things? How many of you have stopped what you are doing, taken a step back and actually re-read your posts from the past few weeks? Do any of you actually dare to risk such self-examination? The forum seems wracked with people hand-wringing about how "things are so bad, I now must leave". Why? To go to another forum that seems peaceful and in a few months get involved in a local scrum there which results in hard feelings and people leaving? Do you want to spend your internet existence moving from forum to forum seeking that one perfect utopia where everyone is happy and everyone loves each other? {here's a hint gang: it doesn't exist, some of us fossils have been moving about internet forums for more than a decade now and have seen quite a bit of drama}

Forums are simply gathering places for groups of folks to get together that share a common interest, at times there will be clashes over substance, personality, philosophy or a host of other potential flash-points. But in the end remember, we are missing some key ingredients here which help in personal relationships between individuals. Vocal inflections and body language are vital cues that humans use to determine the intent and thoughts behind the words which they hear. Without that on the web we must be more cautious in our judgment as sometimes what one says is not what one means. We also have many folks for whom English is not a first language and that can cause additional communication problems. But even with all that we can still rise above the pettiness of two children yelling back and forth at each other "stop touching me!"

The mods are here to keep order on the forum but there is only so much they can do. Many of the fights which are going on right now are nominally within the rules of the forum so in strictest sense the mods don't have to step into to every single one of them to try and keep the peace. And realistically who would expect or want them to? Sometimes a heated discussion can be a good thing, but when it goes from a discourse on ideas into a simple name calling and pissing match then all hope for any further intelligent conversation is lost. A playground full of children don't necessarily need to have the local constables called every time someone gets a bloody nose in a fight. However eventually cooler heads need to prevail.

Can you rise above your animal instincts and behave as rational beings or are you incapable of controlling your emotions and passions over what are essentially trivial matters in the grand scheme of things.

So I ask again, who are you?

Cheers all from the Stainless Steel Rat

[whyaskwhy]

I hope that I'm a friend,an asset,a peace maker,and a healer....Weird for someone who has rape fantasies,right?

If however anyone I am not those things and am in fact something that is detrimental,please feel free to pm me with it so we can discuss it in a civilized and adult way.

(that is what all of the arguments would have benefited from this last month.)

Thank you for this post SSR! Every one needs to look at themselves daily..Including myself.

[Flesh4Fantasy]

A clown
A faction-less friend
A listener
A juggler
A trickster
A hopeless romantic
A person who NEEDS friends
A person who helps friends in NEED

Thanx SSR - will +Rep you for this when I can...

[Conrad]

Where's the douchebag option?? i feel left out.

[theDarkOne]

I think everyone can be all of these things if put in certain situations.We(me) just have to try harder to cut out the negative parts and keep the positive.

Im trying.

[Lucy.]

Originally Posted by newland11

An Instigator
A Friend
A Fighter
A Leader
An Objective person
A person who can always fool around


You can add what you want

Lets be honest Newland:

You are:

Instigator
Follower
Liability
Conartist
Elitist
Bully
Troll

I see all of those in you, and I'm not even trying to be insulting. Its easy for everyone to say "oh im great". None of us are. Especially not you.

He did say we could add what we wanted.

[RapeU]

I think it's more fun if people choose for you. I hate having to choose things for myself.

[theDarkOne]

Originally Posted by Lucy.

Lets be honest Newland:

You are:

Instigator
Follower
Liability
Conartist
Elitist
Bully
Troll

I see all of those in you, and I'm not even trying to be insulting. Its easy for everyone to say "oh im great". None of us are. Especially not you.

He did say we could add what we wanted.

Originally Posted by Stainless Steel Rat

Special Note: This is being placed in Idle Talk for the express purpose of keeping needless fighting from erupting in it, if you start a fight here the mods just might take action.

[Stainless Steel Rat]

I expected that someone would sidestep the purpose of this thread I am disappointed to see that it was you Lucy. The question asked was simple, Who are you? At no time did I ask what someone thinks of someone else. This kind of reactionism is what is keeping this forum in a state of disarray. Until each of us is willing to step back and examine our own selves we are in no position to be critical of others. There are no innocents in the strife which is now upon us. All those involved share in the blame. And eventually all those involved will also share in the solution. I would ask that consider the original question and respond appropriately.

and RapeU, life throws a few obstacles at you every now and then I would simply offer this quote: "the unexamined life is not worth living"

Cheers all from the Stainless Steel Rat

[Lucy.]

Newland did say "you can add what you like". And so I added what I felt was more fitting. Read how he described himself and how I described him and I think you'll find mine far more accurate no? He chose "objective" for crying out loud! Since when was "This is what I think and anything else is wrong" an objective opinion?!

I do apologise SSR as this is your thread, and I'll make no further comment here.

[whyaskwhy]

Originally Posted by Lucy.

Newland did say "you can add what you like".

that was in response to Conrad being a little sarcastic and saying he was sad about not having an option he felt suited him better than the options already give...newland told Conrad that Conrad could add any option refering to Conrad.
I think that should clear up any confusion...
Lets get this thread back on track with-

I'm also a guy
a cyclist
a swimmer
a runner
a painter
a photographer
and a dad...

[BTN]

He's like fire and ice and rage. He's like the night and the storm in the heart of the sun.
He's ancient and forever. He burns at the centre of time and can see the turn of the universe.

and... he's wonderful

[somedude]

I'm the rapinist cowboy in the whole USA

[snarkopo]

Originally Posted by somedude

I'm the rapinist cowboy in the whole USA

You should arrest yourself.

[Sierra]

I am probably all of those things at one time or another, Stainless Steel Rat.

I both lead and follow
I'm an instigator and a peacemaker
I can be a good friend or a formidable foe

Lucy has come in for a lot of heat, and rightfully so in some cases, but I also know her to be a sweet and lovely woman with an impish sense of fun.

TheDarkOne can be harsh and pugnacious, but he can also be a loyal and caring friend who will give you the shirt off his back.

Newland can be dictatorial and dismissive, but he is willing to embrace change and participate in it.

As for me, like all of us, there is both good and bad in my nature, and I will take my share of the responsibility for mistakes and for my successes.

When we start seeing each other as all good or all bad we lose sight of the person. When an issue becomes black or white to you, you lose the shades of gray that are the common ground. And when a discussion becomes so polarized that someone who is not 100% for you is against you, listening stops and we all talk AT each other instead of TO each other and it goes to hell.

Maybe now we are all so weary of fighting that we can start listening.

[whyaskwhy]

Originally Posted by Sierra

I am probably all of those things at one time or another, Stainless Steel Rat.

I both lead and follow
I'm an instigator and a peacemaker
I can be a good friend or a formidable foe

Lucy has come in for a lot of heat, and rightfully so in some cases, but I also know her to be a sweet and lovely woman with an impish sense of fun.

TheDarkOne can be harsh and pugnacious, but he can also be a loyal and caring friend who will give you the shirt off his back.

Newland can be dictatorial and dismissive, but he is willing to embrace change and participate in it.

As for me, like all of us, there is both good and bad in my nature, and I will take my share of the responsibility for mistakes and for my successes.

When we start seeing each other as all good or all bad we lose sight of the person. When an issue becomes black or white to you, you lose the shades of gray that are the common ground. And when a discussion becomes so polarized that someone who is not 100% for you is against you, listening stops and we all talk AT each other instead of TO each other and it goes to hell.

Maybe now we are all so weary of fighting that we can start listening.

Your pretty amazing.This is so true...We all would love to be perfect...Sadly no one (except maybe myself.HA,HA!) is.We are all flawed..Imperfect...Human!

[Lucy.]

Originally Posted by Sierra

Newland can be dictatorial and dismissive, but he is willing to embrace change and participate in it.

Maybe now we are all so weary of fighting that we can start listening.

Newland is the only person to give me -rep. He is a bully and everything I said was correct. He doesn't embrace change, he forces his opinion on people and then negative reps them if they don't agree, often crushing smaller members reputations, resulting in them leaving.

[snarkopo]

Now Lucy's banned. Fuck. I know she posted a thread that is now deleted but I liked her anyway. She was fiesty and took no crap.
Anyway... moving on.

[SecretObsession]

Originally Posted by Stainless Steel Rat

...
So who are you?

A Prima Donna?
A Drama Queen?
An Elitist?
An Instigator?
A Martyr?
A Bully?
A Troll?
A Fraud?
A Friend?
A Foe?
A Spammer?
A Con Artist?
A Lover?
A Fighter?
An Asset?
A Liability?
A Leader?
A Follower?
A Healer?
A Peacemaker?
...

A pursuer of knowledge
A martyr
An outspoken and opinionated woman
A shy girl
A fighter
An analytical type
A judgemental bitch
An empathetic caregiver
A party girl
A loner
A ringleader
A mischief-maker
A nurturer
A tease

[kitty_joanne]

a housewife
a shopaholic
a private tutor
a timid person
a heavy sleeper
a pushover
a optimist
a crybaby
a swindler
a man eater

i feel rather down about myself right now, after making this list >.<