Sex addiction - Rape Board

Sasha Girl · 04-21-2013, 04:41 AM

Someone please correct me if this doesn't belong here.

Basically, my question is: at what point can a person be classified as having a sex addiction?

I have approached this question both as a scientist and a slut / potential sex addict. Generally, a pleasurable activity is defined as an addiction when it starts to interfere with the person's work, family and social life. However, I personally feel this definition is inadequate. I mean - even where these criteria aren't satisfied, rape fantasy can be so damn pleasurable as to make one want to spend exorbitant amounts of time writing stories, reading stories and engaging in role plays. At what point does this orgasmic past time stop being a past time and start being an addiction? Is it:

1. When it is the only thing you want to do in your spare time
2. When other types of sex become dull and disinteresting
3. A combination of the two
4. Other?

A further question I've been asking myself: is it possible to have sex addiction and not know it?

perfectlyformed · 04-21-2013, 04:50 AM

I would have though a sex addiction is going to be defined in much the same way as any chemical addiction. In other words to need it regularly and frequently. Its absence means a change in attitude and personallity (getting grumpy) and even physical syptoms like tremors.

x

Jaybee · 04-22-2013, 01:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sasha Girl

Someone please correct me if this doesn't belong here.

Basically, my question is: at what point can a person be classified as having a sex addiction?

I have approached this question both as a scientist and a slut / potential sex addict. Generally, a pleasurable activity is defined as an addiction when it starts to interfere with the person's work, family and social life. However, I personally feel this definition is inadequate. I mean - even where these criteria aren't satisfied, rape fantasy can be so damn pleasurable as to make one want to spend exorbitant amounts of time writing stories, reading stories and engaging in role plays. At what point does this orgasmic past time stop being a past time and start being an addiction? Is it:

1. When it is the only thing you want to do in your spare time
2. When other types of sex become dull and disinteresting
3. A combination of the two
4. Other?

A further question I've been asking myself: is it possible to have sex addiction and not know it?

What is this "Spare time" thing you speak of?

If I COULD have sex all my spare time, I probably would. A better way to look at is is to ask yourself if you are actually doing anything awake that is both non-vocational and non-sexual.

So, I would draw the line between addicted and non-addicted not as how MUCH you want to be fantasy-raped, but rather how little else you are actually doing when awake and not fantasising.

Sierra · 04-22-2013, 03:02 PM

I have traditionally been skeptical of the whole concept of sex addiction. It seems to me nothing more or less than thinking about it all the time, which pretty much describes every teenaged boy I've ever met. Some people never quite get out of the habit.

I've been forced to re-think, however. There was a man I worked with. He was good at his job, has a lovely wife and a couple of kids, and made enough money to support a comfortable life style. Our IT department reported that he was looking at porn in the office. The bosses told him that he was being watched and he needed to save the porn for home. He was deeply embarrassed and promised to stay off the smut sites.

Long story short - he couldn't do it. He visited porn sites up to 50 times in an 8-hour workday, even after he was told that his usage was being monitored. He tried to stop but couldn't eat, sleep or concentrate unless he had his porn fix. He was finally fired, his wife divorced him, and last I heard he was working as a dishwasher in a restaurant.

True story!

I guess that would count as a sex addiction of sorts. I mean.... I like sex as much as the next person (maybe more), but there are limits.

justmetoo · 04-22-2013, 03:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sierra

Long story short - he couldn't do it. He visited porn sites up to 50 times in an 8-hour workday, even after he was told that his usage was being monitored. He tried to stop but couldn't eat, sleep or concentrate unless he had his porn fix. He was finally fired, his wife divorced him, and last I heard he was working as a dishwasher in a restaurant.

True story!

I guess that would count as a sex addiction of sorts. I mean.... I like sex as much as the next person (maybe more), but there are limits.

I would imagine anything you indulge in for a large part of your day that you can't give up could be considered an addiction. Certainly basic needs such as food, water, breathing and such don't come into play. But anything that you do to an excess that impacts your life but yet you can't give up on would qualify as an addiction in my opinion.

Sasha Girl · 04-22-2013, 03:36 PM

Porn addiction is real and is slightly different from sex addiction. I've heard a lot about porn addiction, it is an issue for men apparently.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sierra

I have traditionally been skeptical of the whole concept of sex addiction. It seems to me nothing more or less than thinking about it all the time, which pretty much describes every teenaged boy I've ever met. Some people never quite get out of the habit.

I've been forced to re-think, however. There was a man I worked with. He was good at his job, has a lovely wife and a couple of kids, and made enough money to support a comfortable life style. Our IT department reported that he was looking at porn in the office. The bosses told him that he was being watched and he needed to save the porn for home. He was deeply embarrassed and promised to stay off the smut sites.

Long story short - he couldn't do it. He visited porn sites up to 50 times in an 8-hour workday, even after he was told that his usage was being monitored. He tried to stop but couldn't eat, sleep or concentrate unless he had his porn fix. He was finally fired, his wife divorced him, and last I heard he was working as a dishwasher in a restaurant.

True story!

I guess that would count as a sex addiction of sorts. I mean.... I like sex as much as the next person (maybe more), but there are limits.

Res · 04-22-2013, 04:44 PM

Anything can be an addiction, but it is only classified as that when it starts interfering with your life. In the case of sex, this becomes an addiction when...

a) you start missing work to have sex, masturbate, or think about/write about sex
b) your actions sexually are damaging to your relationships (excessive cheating is considered a by-product of sex addiction)
c) you start practicing unsafe sex while sleeping around with many partners (and this is out of character for you)

I'm sure there's more I'm just not thinking of.

BAMF · 04-22-2013, 04:44 PM

Its like any addiction is your life unmanageable due to it?

Replace alcohol with sex...
http://www.aa.org/lang/en/subpage.cfm?page=71

BAMF · 04-22-2013, 04:45 PM

Res you beat me too it...

Sasha Girl · 04-22-2013, 04:46 PM

No, I usually turn to sex when life starts messing with me. I never neglect my responsibilities, I guess that's where I draw the line.

04-21-2013, 04:41 AM	#1
Sasha Girl Privileged Member Join Date: Apr 2013 Location: Australia Posts: 268 Reputation: 2013	Sex addiction Someone please correct me if this doesn't belong here. Basically, my question is: at what point can a person be classified as having a sex addiction? I have approached this question both as a scientist and a slut / potential sex addict. Generally, a pleasurable activity is defined as an addiction when it starts to interfere with the person's work, family and social life. However, I personally feel this definition is inadequate. I mean - even where these criteria aren't satisfied, rape fantasy can be so damn pleasurable as to make one want to spend exorbitant amounts of time writing stories, reading stories and engaging in role plays. At what point does this orgasmic past time stop being a past time and start being an addiction? Is it: 1. When it is the only thing you want to do in your spare time 2. When other types of sex become dull and disinteresting 3. A combination of the two 4. Other? A further question I've been asking myself: is it possible to have sex addiction and not know it? __________________ I'm a wicked, vile, horrible and perfect man. - the Savage, during one of his more modest moments. "I'm a sex addict - it's my cross to bear." - from "The Blades of Glory"

04-21-2013, 04:50 AM	#2
perfectlyformed Living Sextoy Join Date: Jul 2007 Location: London, UK Posts: 3,500 Reputation: 103987	I would have though a sex addiction is going to be defined in much the same way as any chemical addiction. In other words to need it regularly and frequently. Its absence means a change in attitude and personallity (getting grumpy) and even physical syptoms like tremors. x __________________ -- Fear is a four letter word. So is rape, fuck, knot, anal, hump, nuts, lick, clit shag, blow, bend, hard, deep, cunt, slut, bang, tits, dick, oral, used, easy, suck, cock, arse, slap, hold, fist and gang. So all the good ones basically..... x

04-22-2013, 03:02 PM	#4
Sierra Privileged Member Join Date: Dec 2007 Location: Northern California Posts: 1,625 Reputation: 129196	I have traditionally been skeptical of the whole concept of sex addiction. It seems to me nothing more or less than thinking about it all the time, which pretty much describes every teenaged boy I've ever met. Some people never quite get out of the habit. I've been forced to re-think, however. There was a man I worked with. He was good at his job, has a lovely wife and a couple of kids, and made enough money to support a comfortable life style. Our IT department reported that he was looking at porn in the office. The bosses told him that he was being watched and he needed to save the porn for home. He was deeply embarrassed and promised to stay off the smut sites. Long story short - he couldn't do it. He visited porn sites up to 50 times in an 8-hour workday, even after he was told that his usage was being monitored. He tried to stop but couldn't eat, sleep or concentrate unless he had his porn fix. He was finally fired, his wife divorced him, and last I heard he was working as a dishwasher in a restaurant. True story! I guess that would count as a sex addiction of sorts. I mean.... I like sex as much as the next person (maybe more), but there are limits. __________________ Although the most incisive judges of the witches and even the witches themselves were convinced of the guilt of witchcraft, this guilt nevertheless did not exist. Thus it is with all guilt.

04-22-2013, 04:44 PM	#8
BAMF Member Join Date: Apr 2013 Location: 7th tier of Hell Posts: 39 Reputation: 3452	Its like any addiction is your life unmanageable due to it? Replace alcohol with sex... http://www.aa.org/lang/en/subpage.cfm?page=71 __________________ FYYFF

04-22-2013, 04:45 PM	#9
BAMF Member Join Date: Apr 2013 Location: 7th tier of Hell Posts: 39 Reputation: 3452	Res you beat me too it... __________________ FYYFF

04-22-2013, 04:44 PM	#7
Res Junior Member Join Date: Apr 2013 Posts: 10 Reputation: 269	Anything can be an addiction, but it is only classified as that when it starts interfering with your life. In the case of sex, this becomes an addiction when... a) you start missing work to have sex, masturbate, or think about/write about sex b) your actions sexually are damaging to your relationships (excessive cheating is considered a by-product of sex addiction) c) you start practicing unsafe sex while sleeping around with many partners (and this is out of character for you) I'm sure there's more I'm just not thinking of.

04-22-2013, 04:46 PM	#10
Sasha Girl Privileged Member Join Date: Apr 2013 Location: Australia Posts: 268 Reputation: 2013	No, I usually turn to sex when life starts messing with me. I never neglect my responsibilities, I guess that's where I draw the line. __________________ I'm a wicked, vile, horrible and perfect man. - the Savage, during one of his more modest moments. "I'm a sex addict - it's my cross to bear." - from "The Blades of Glory"