Ways to answer the phone - Rape Board

Jasmine · 05-26-2007, 01:11 AM

We've all heard people answer the phone with clever or not so clever lines such as "Joe's Pool Hall. Cue ball speaking!"

My favorite is, "Sleeping Beauty's Castle. Which beauty would you like to sleep with?"

What are some of yours?

dashrendar44 · 05-26-2007, 01:28 AM

joes crematorium, you kill em we grill em!

Talk To Me... (A La Jack Bauer from 24 XDDDD)

Darkman · 05-26-2007, 01:31 AM

I like the old simpsons "hello city morgue" sometimes i just go with "i love you" or "meatjoy" depending what mood im in.

MADDOGMCMANAMAN · 05-26-2007, 01:49 AM

damn u lot must be lucky lol..i usually get some prick threatening to kill me or some girl tryin to find out info on me lol

thats why when i answer the phone i dont say ANYTHING lol.....they phoned me they can speak first goddamit !! and if i know its sum1 with bad intentions lol...then i just make sum crackling sounds and hang up !!

Luke rape stalker · 05-26-2007, 06:42 PM

long long ago...

i was in the army, had a lot of stress and trouble. So my motivation was not the best.
The phone rings, i pick up the receiver: "Eiffel Tower Paris here..." (this was the handsomest in this time)
it was my highest chief...

joes crematorium i used too in this time

tnc4fun · 05-27-2007, 02:57 AM

Got this here newfangled caller id...so now, I don't answer the phone unless I know who it is.

No, I don't want to buy siding or give to Mr. X's presidential campaign...

Ntense · 05-28-2007, 09:14 AM

"Hello, Amy's Escort service! The client always cums first..."
(only to unknown or wrong numbers)

Always loved the line from 'Ruthless People'
Sam Stone: [answering the phone] Hello? Debbie? Yeah, Debbie's here, who's this? Well, Ralph, uh, Debbie can't talk right now, my dick's in her mouth. How about if I have her call you back later when I'm done?
[hangs up and laughs]
Sam Stone: I love wrong numbers.

If you're in the USofA, go to http://www.donotcall.gov or dial 1-888-382-1222 from your phone to block most telemarketers. It's working fine for me. I don't think charitable organizations or survey people have to follow it, but that's what the receiver switch is for <click! buzzzz...>

menace · 05-28-2007, 10:26 AM

Don't know if you have it in the US and UK, but my favourite line is from Alan Ford comics, by a grumpy parrot named Clodovic:

"Yeah, who's bothering?"

sindyloo · 05-28-2007, 10:45 AM

Favorite line is from a Joe Pesci movie heads in a Duffle bag..........any way love using it when telemarketers call trying to sell me some crap!

"Hey excuse me help me out here........Does this sound like a Phone Hanging Up???" Then you hang up soooo damn funny!

MADDOGMCMANAMAN · 05-29-2007, 01:47 AM

lol u should pretend ur interested in their products and keep them on the phone for ages....and then tell them to FUCK OFF !!! lol

jack-the-ripa · 05-29-2007, 08:07 AM

Santa's workshop here... May I take your order?

my dark side · 05-29-2007, 08:32 AM

If i am in a really bad mood i just go with the simple
" Yeah, what do ya want"

tnc4fun · 05-29-2007, 09:25 AM

While I admit caller id is fine, what's really needed is a switch that will send 10,000 volts to the other end of the line.

Shocking, I know

sindyloo · 05-29-2007, 12:39 PM

Great idea 4fun bet you could make a million off of that invention!

Another line I love to use is (sorry Dash)..........."Hello Stowes Mortuary. You Stab Them...We Slab Them! Some go to Heaven and Some go to Hell! May We Help you DOWN??"

MADDOGMCMANAMAN · 05-31-2007, 09:13 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tnc4fun

While I admit caller id is fine, what's really needed is a switch that will send 10,000 volts to the other end of the line.

Shocking, I know

lmao .. now theres an invention lol !!

Darkman · 06-01-2007, 06:45 AM

you know i saw on tv that some people can phone the operator with a special number and they can send a jolt down the phone line so they can start their heart if they have a heart attack, always wanted to find the number out!

alg9 · 06-01-2007, 01:51 PM

Well normally I just answer the phone by saying "Speak!" but if I do glance at my caller ID and find its someone I want to fuck with, like my friends, I'll just keeping telling them they have the wrong number.

05-26-2007, 01:11 AM	#1
Jasmine Privileged Member Join Date: Jul 2006 Posts: 2,352 Reputation: 20045	Ways to answer the phone We've all heard people answer the phone with clever or not so clever lines such as "Joe's Pool Hall. Cue ball speaking!" My favorite is, "Sleeping Beauty's Castle. Which beauty would you like to sleep with?" What are some of yours?

05-26-2007, 01:28 AM	#2
dashrendar44 Kamina Join Date: Dec 2006 Location: Deep In The African Jungles Of China Posts: 2,733 Reputation: 12819	joes crematorium, you kill em we grill em! Talk To Me... (A La Jack Bauer from 24 XDDDD) __________________ "Go beyond the impossible and kick reason to the curb!" ~ Kamina, Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann "I've been thinking with my gut since I was 14, and I've come to the conclusion that my guts have shit for brains." ~ Rob Gordon, High Fidelity "All men are potential rapists. ALL MEN. Even the pope!" ~ Shirley Valentine "When you're pushed, killing's as easy as breathing." ~ John Rambo, Rambo IV "I don't think I'm easy to talk about. I've got a very irregular head. And I'm not anything that you think I am anyway." ~ Syd Barrett, Rolling Stone, December 1971

05-26-2007, 01:31 AM	#3
Darkman its all give and take Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: Manchester UK Posts: 688 Reputation: 179	I like the old simpsons "hello city morgue" sometimes i just go with "i love you" or "meatjoy" depending what mood im in. __________________ just do it

05-26-2007, 01:49 AM	#4
MADDOGMCMANAMAN PUSSYCRUSHER Join Date: Jan 2007 Location: YOUR MOMMAS HOUSE Posts: 2,161 Reputation: 9875	damn u lot must be lucky lol..i usually get some prick threatening to kill me or some girl tryin to find out info on me lol thats why when i answer the phone i dont say ANYTHING lol.....they phoned me they can speak first goddamit !! and if i know its sum1 with bad intentions lol...then i just make sum crackling sounds and hang up !! __________________ The Original PUSSYCRUSHER !!

05-27-2007, 02:57 AM	#6
tnc4fun Privileged Member Join Date: Jan 2007 Location: Maryland, USA Posts: 203 Reputation: 453	Got this here newfangled caller id...so now, I don't answer the phone unless I know who it is. No, I don't want to buy siding or give to Mr. X's presidential campaign... __________________ The principles of lust are easy to understand, Do what you feel, feel until the end. The principles of lust are burned into your mind, Do what you want, do it until you find...love. Basic instincts, social life Paradoxes side by side Don't submit to stupid rules Be yourself and nobody's fool Don't accept average habits Open your heart and push the limits. The path of excess leads to the Tower of Wisdom. St. Michael Cretu

05-26-2007, 06:42 PM	#5
Luke rape stalker or Jekyll and Hyde Join Date: Apr 2006 Posts: 781 Reputation: 1695	long long ago... i was in the army, had a lot of stress and trouble. So my motivation was not the best. The phone rings, i pick up the receiver: "Eiffel Tower Paris here..." (this was the handsomest in this time) it was my highest chief... joes crematorium i used too in this time

05-28-2007, 09:14 AM	#7
Ntense Privileged Member Join Date: May 2007 Location: Texass Posts: 688 Reputation: 541	"Hello, Amy's Escort service! The client always cums first..." (only to unknown or wrong numbers) Always loved the line from 'Ruthless People' Sam Stone: [answering the phone] Hello? Debbie? Yeah, Debbie's here, who's this? Well, Ralph, uh, Debbie can't talk right now, my dick's in her mouth. How about if I have her call you back later when I'm done? [hangs up and laughs] Sam Stone: I love wrong numbers. If you're in the USofA, go to http://www.donotcall.gov or dial 1-888-382-1222 from your phone to block most telemarketers. It's working fine for me. I don't think charitable organizations or survey people have to follow it, but that's what the receiver switch is for <click! buzzzz...> __________________ Character is what you are in the dark... John Whorfin Last edited by Ntense; 05-28-2007 at 09:17 AM.

05-28-2007, 10:26 AM	#8
menace Privileged Member Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: Who knows? Posts: 2,436 Reputation: 26964	Don't know if you have it in the US and UK, but my favourite line is from Alan Ford comics, by a grumpy parrot named Clodovic: "Yeah, who's bothering?" __________________ Try and stop me

05-28-2007, 10:45 AM	#9
sindyloo Privileged Member Join Date: Nov 2006 Posts: 2,178 Reputation: 34844	Favorite line is from a Joe Pesci movie heads in a Duffle bag..........any way love using it when telemarketers call trying to sell me some crap! "Hey excuse me help me out here........Does this sound like a Phone Hanging Up???" Then you hang up soooo damn funny! __________________ Tommy Loy, the cabin boy, The dirty little nipper, He filled his ass With broken glass And cirumcized the skipper!

05-29-2007, 01:47 AM	#10
MADDOGMCMANAMAN PUSSYCRUSHER Join Date: Jan 2007 Location: YOUR MOMMAS HOUSE Posts: 2,161 Reputation: 9875	lol u should pretend ur interested in their products and keep them on the phone for ages....and then tell them to FUCK OFF !!! lol __________________ The Original PUSSYCRUSHER !!

05-29-2007, 08:07 AM	#11
jack-the-ripa Banned Join Date: May 2007 Location: www.asexuality.org Posts: 203 Reputation: 77	Santa's workshop here... May I take your order?

05-29-2007, 08:32 AM	#12
my dark side Banned Join Date: Jan 2007 Location: Away from here Posts: 2,038 Reputation: 1051	If i am in a really bad mood i just go with the simple " Yeah, what do ya want"

05-29-2007, 09:25 AM	#13
tnc4fun Privileged Member Join Date: Jan 2007 Location: Maryland, USA Posts: 203 Reputation: 453	While I admit caller id is fine, what's really needed is a switch that will send 10,000 volts to the other end of the line. Shocking, I know __________________ The principles of lust are easy to understand, Do what you feel, feel until the end. The principles of lust are burned into your mind, Do what you want, do it until you find...love. Basic instincts, social life Paradoxes side by side Don't submit to stupid rules Be yourself and nobody's fool Don't accept average habits Open your heart and push the limits. The path of excess leads to the Tower of Wisdom. St. Michael Cretu Last edited by tnc4fun; 05-29-2007 at 01:27 PM.

05-29-2007, 12:39 PM	#14
sindyloo Privileged Member Join Date: Nov 2006 Posts: 2,178 Reputation: 34844	Great idea 4fun bet you could make a million off of that invention! Another line I love to use is (sorry Dash)..........."Hello Stowes Mortuary. You Stab Them...We Slab Them! Some go to Heaven and Some go to Hell! May We Help you DOWN??" __________________ Tommy Loy, the cabin boy, The dirty little nipper, He filled his ass With broken glass And cirumcized the skipper!

06-01-2007, 06:45 AM	#16
Darkman its all give and take Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: Manchester UK Posts: 688 Reputation: 179	you know i saw on tv that some people can phone the operator with a special number and they can send a jolt down the phone line so they can start their heart if they have a heart attack, always wanted to find the number out! __________________ just do it

06-01-2007, 01:51 PM	#17
alg9 Privileged Member Join Date: Mar 2007 Location: fields of Valhalla Posts: 722 Reputation: 1222	Well normally I just answer the phone by saying "Speak!" but if I do glance at my caller ID and find its someone I want to fuck with, like my friends, I'll just keeping telling them they have the wrong number. __________________ To honor For honor On honor if you can't cum in her Then cum on her

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