A Lament for the Glory that was Mystery Science Theater 3000 - Rape Board

angkorwat · 06-29-2009, 12:05 PM

Since I know at least three people are fans of the show, which was unjustly canceled long before its time, I think it is only proper for us to discuss the glory and legend that is Mystery Science Theater 3000. For ye heathen who have never basked in the righteous light of MST3k, the show consists of the main character, Joel Robinson, then later Mike Nelson making fun of awful movies with the help of two robots, Tom Servo and Crow T. Robot. Here is a list of a few of my favorite episodes:

Space Mutiny: Awful acting, terrible clichÃ©d plot and special effects ripped off the original Battlestar Gallactica, which predates this movies by almost 20 years. The best of the riffing is, by far, making fun of the propensity for villain to fall over railings when they die and making up manly names of the movie's hero: Big Mclargehuge, Slab Squatthrust, Lump Beefbroth and Slab Largehead to name a few. One of the best episodes.

The Quest of the Delta Knights: A rather confused story with dark age vikings in late medieval England where Leonardo da Vinci and the main character search for Archimede's workshop, which is somehow also in England. Two characters are played by the same person (who I've you've played Baldur's Gate 2, you will recognize as the voice of John Irenicus) and they have to talk to each other at times. More terrible acting, along with extras described as "ren-fest rejects" and the observation that Wench jacking was serious crime in the middle ages.

Overdrawn at the Memory Bank: Don't ever put a good movie in your bad movie--wisdom from Tom Servo about this movie. Starring a real actor--Raul Julia and made for Canadian public television. This movie takes place in a rather poorly establish future the makes no sense. The main character watches forbidden movies, most notably, Casablanca, which is referenced many times in the movies, hence Tom Servo's advice. The main villain is a fat who, who they make fun as such with such lines as "Pork shipments late today." Another great episode.

Lastly, Manos the Hands of Fate: Made as dare by an El Paso garbage man to prove that he could make a successful movie: he failed. All the voices in the movie are dubbed by three movie, necessitating at times that the same voice talks to itself. The movie is awful beyond discretion--it routinely is high on lists of worst movies every made.

Perhaps other MST3k fans would like to describe other good episodes they've seen or further the discussion on any of these movies? Also, now that I think about, if any of you would like to see these movies I think I should be able to take time away from uploading rape to masses to upload MST3k to the masses.

Dollface · 06-29-2009, 04:38 PM

Viva la Mike!

dashrendar44 · 06-29-2009, 07:23 PM

haha, youve left out some favourites of mine. ill always love space mutiny and manos (btw, for those that have seen space mutiny, you may get a kick out of this: )

episodes i would reccomend

santa claus conquers the martains: this movie is insane, its basically evi martains thet kidnap santa and 2 kids because they want christmas on mars, terrible dialogue, acting, production, and essential MST2K viewing.

Mitchell: a joe don baker movie about a lazy drunken cop. tied with space mutiny for most hilarious chase sequence ever made, and joels last episode as host of the show.

diabolik: the last episode of the series, this one is about a thief essentially...except hes really random and lame, and everything about this movie is ass. i dont really have the words for it, but its a pretty damn good episode.

and my favourite episode of all time...

the final sacrifice: a terrible canadian film about a buy trying to find out about what his father was doing before he died, he discovers a cult of guys in balaclavas that do nothing, and meets up with the greatest named guy eever (totally not spoiling the win of this). if theres on eepisode i urge you to see, its this one, though theres a "best moments of" for it on youtube.

also angkorwat, all the episodes are on google video. quality is meh, but it doesnt really matter, since is not like the movies have any qualities to lose out on anyways

angkorwat · 06-29-2009, 11:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by dashrendar44

haha, youve left out some favourites of mine. ill always love space mutiny and manos (btw, for those that have seen space mutiny, you may get a kick out of this: )

episodes i would reccomend

santa claus conquers the martains: this movie is insane, its basically evi martains thet kidnap santa and 2 kids because they want christmas on mars, terrible dialogue, acting, production, and essential MST2K viewing.

Mitchell: a joe don baker movie about a lazy drunken cop. tied with space mutiny for most hilarious chase sequence ever made, and joels last episode as host of the show.

diabolik: the last episode of the series, this one is about a thief essentially...except hes really random and lame, and everything about this movie is ass. i dont really have the words for it, but its a pretty damn good episode.

and my favourite episode of all time...

the final sacrifice: a terrible canadian film about a buy trying to find out about what his father was doing before he died, he discovers a cult of guys in balaclavas that do nothing, and meets up with the greatest named guy eever (totally not spoiling the win of this). if theres on eepisode i urge you to see, its this one, though theres a "best moments of" for it on youtube.

also angkorwat, all the episodes are on google video. quality is meh, but it doesnt really matter, since is not like the movies have any qualities to lose out on anyways

Who doesn't love Rowsdower? I've seen Final Sacrifice, which is good one, espeically the Quebecois mafia. I've also seen Santa Claus Conquerors the Martians and all I have to say is "Febtober." I've never seen that Joe Don Baker episode, but I have seen the one where he goes to Malta, I suppose I'll have to watch that movie. While it may be possible to watch all the movies on google video, it is much easier to simply download them and have for a much longer time. Now that I think about, I can think of two more movies that I really liked:

Invasion U.S.A.: thinly diguished propoganda about the U.S. being invaded by people with really bad Slavic accents because we didn't allow the government to do anything it wanted, also the Russians will bomb the U.S. with American planes.

Hercules and the Captive Women: for the most gratuitous and continuous use of the phrase "the blood of Uranus" ever in a movie.

theDarkOne · 06-29-2009, 11:56 PM

MST3K Rules

One of my favorite shows of all time.I was lucky enough to see the movie as well as 2 episodes in the theater.Very cool way to see it.I used to think i was more a Joel person but the more i think about it i like Mike just as much.
Every character is great but if i had to pick one i would go with Crow.

As for favorite episodes.
I don't think there is a bad one but i was always fond of
the 70s and 80s movies.
Here are a few i like a lot.

Quote:

Originally Posted by dashrendar44

Mitchell: a joe don baker movie about a lazy drunken cop. tied with space mutiny for most hilarious chase sequence ever made, and joels last episode as host of the show.

Possibly my #1.I quote that episode still to this day.I even own the original movie.
(here is a best of)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=InHgWFrQRbI

Deathstalker
A medieval adventure movie.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Kat4uFMJ8Iw

Master Ninja
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g0lIOaq3oEY

Mst3K is one of those shows i wish they would bring back.
You can watch so many episodes on YouTube.

dashrendar44 · 06-30-2009, 03:31 AM

well, MST3K isnt really dead anyways. joel does cinematictitanic and mike does rifftrax, both of which are basically MST3K...rifftrax doesnt use the characters or anything, but the same voices are there, and they riff on the really recent shitty movies, and even some not so shitty ones too.

theDarkOne · 06-30-2009, 01:00 PM

Damn i did not know that.Thank you Dash

Im going to have to check that out.

pervipete · 06-30-2009, 03:11 PM

I so have to check these out

06-29-2009, 07:23 PM	#3
dashrendar44 Kamina Join Date: Dec 2006 Location: Deep In The African Jungles Of China Posts: 2,733 Reputation: 12819	haha, youve left out some favourites of mine. ill always love space mutiny and manos (btw, for those that have seen space mutiny, you may get a kick out of this: ) episodes i would reccomend santa claus conquers the martains: this movie is insane, its basically evi martains thet kidnap santa and 2 kids because they want christmas on mars, terrible dialogue, acting, production, and essential MST2K viewing. Mitchell: a joe don baker movie about a lazy drunken cop. tied with space mutiny for most hilarious chase sequence ever made, and joels last episode as host of the show. diabolik: the last episode of the series, this one is about a thief essentially...except hes really random and lame, and everything about this movie is ass. i dont really have the words for it, but its a pretty damn good episode. and my favourite episode of all time... the final sacrifice: a terrible canadian film about a buy trying to find out about what his father was doing before he died, he discovers a cult of guys in balaclavas that do nothing, and meets up with the greatest named guy eever (totally not spoiling the win of this). if theres on eepisode i urge you to see, its this one, though theres a "best moments of" for it on youtube. also angkorwat, all the episodes are on google video. quality is meh, but it doesnt really matter, since is not like the movies have any qualities to lose out on anyways __________________ "Go beyond the impossible and kick reason to the curb!" ~ Kamina, Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann "I've been thinking with my gut since I was 14, and I've come to the conclusion that my guts have shit for brains." ~ Rob Gordon, High Fidelity "All men are potential rapists. ALL MEN. Even the pope!" ~ Shirley Valentine "When you're pushed, killing's as easy as breathing." ~ John Rambo, Rambo IV "I don't think I'm easy to talk about. I've got a very irregular head. And I'm not anything that you think I am anyway." ~ Syd Barrett, Rolling Stone, December 1971

06-30-2009, 03:31 AM	#6
dashrendar44 Kamina Join Date: Dec 2006 Location: Deep In The African Jungles Of China Posts: 2,733 Reputation: 12819	well, MST3K isnt really dead anyways. joel does cinematictitanic and mike does rifftrax, both of which are basically MST3K...rifftrax doesnt use the characters or anything, but the same voices are there, and they riff on the really recent shitty movies, and even some not so shitty ones too. __________________ "Go beyond the impossible and kick reason to the curb!" ~ Kamina, Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann "I've been thinking with my gut since I was 14, and I've come to the conclusion that my guts have shit for brains." ~ Rob Gordon, High Fidelity "All men are potential rapists. ALL MEN. Even the pope!" ~ Shirley Valentine "When you're pushed, killing's as easy as breathing." ~ John Rambo, Rambo IV "I don't think I'm easy to talk about. I've got a very irregular head. And I'm not anything that you think I am anyway." ~ Syd Barrett, Rolling Stone, December 1971

06-30-2009, 01:00 PM	#7
theDarkOne Banned Join Date: Dec 2007 Location: Never gonna give you up,Never gonna let you down,Never gonna run around and desert you. Posts: 1,693 Reputation: 57368	Damn i did not know that.Thank you DashIm going to have to check that out.

06-30-2009, 03:11 PM	#8
pervipete Watching from the shadows Join Date: Nov 2008 Location: The Shadowlands... Posts: 5,170 Reputation: 118528	I so have to check these out __________________ Tonight love, we'll do a rape roleplay No!! That's the spirit... Spam Reporting Thread The Hazelton Chronicles Blackmailing the MILF's Chapter One The Rape Board Chronicles - LilLinzi in the Alley Consquences

06-29-2009, 12:05 PM	#1
angkorwat \|Ψ>AB ≠ Σij cij\|i>A⊗\|j>B Join Date: Jul 2008 Location: D.C. Posts: 266 Reputation: 10761	A Lament for the Glory that was Mystery Science Theater 3000 Since I know at least three people are fans of the show, which was unjustly canceled long before its time, I think it is only proper for us to discuss the glory and legend that is Mystery Science Theater 3000. For ye heathen who have never basked in the righteous light of MST3k, the show consists of the main character, Joel Robinson, then later Mike Nelson making fun of awful movies with the help of two robots, Tom Servo and Crow T. Robot. Here is a list of a few of my favorite episodes: Space Mutiny: Awful acting, terrible clichÃ©d plot and special effects ripped off the original Battlestar Gallactica, which predates this movies by almost 20 years. The best of the riffing is, by far, making fun of the propensity for villain to fall over railings when they die and making up manly names of the movie's hero: Big Mclargehuge, Slab Squatthrust, Lump Beefbroth and Slab Largehead to name a few. One of the best episodes. The Quest of the Delta Knights: A rather confused story with dark age vikings in late medieval England where Leonardo da Vinci and the main character search for Archimede's workshop, which is somehow also in England. Two characters are played by the same person (who I've you've played Baldur's Gate 2, you will recognize as the voice of John Irenicus) and they have to talk to each other at times. More terrible acting, along with extras described as "ren-fest rejects" and the observation that Wench jacking was serious crime in the middle ages. Overdrawn at the Memory Bank: Don't ever put a good movie in your bad movie--wisdom from Tom Servo about this movie. Starring a real actor--Raul Julia and made for Canadian public television. This movie takes place in a rather poorly establish future the makes no sense. The main character watches forbidden movies, most notably, Casablanca, which is referenced many times in the movies, hence Tom Servo's advice. The main villain is a fat who, who they make fun as such with such lines as "Pork shipments late today." Another great episode. Lastly, Manos the Hands of Fate: Made as dare by an El Paso garbage man to prove that he could make a successful movie: he failed. All the voices in the movie are dubbed by three movie, necessitating at times that the same voice talks to itself. The movie is awful beyond discretion--it routinely is high on lists of worst movies every made. Perhaps other MST3k fans would like to describe other good episodes they've seen or further the discussion on any of these movies? Also, now that I think about, if any of you would like to see these movies I think I should be able to take time away from uploading rape to masses to upload MST3k to the masses. __________________ E=M

06-29-2009, 04:38 PM	#2
Dollface Privileged Member Join Date: Mar 2009 Posts: 370 Reputation: 12223	Viva la Mike!