[dashrendar44]

Chi, you have to keep in mind that there are various levels of love. Sure, you cared about this fellow, even loved him, but its not love like you're looking for. There are miles of difference between love like a friend and passionate love, and many other kinds inbetween. You're obviously looking for passionate love (hell, we all are) but...I don't know. I'm obviously not one to give out advice about this area of the pool, so to speak, but I'd say you're not doing something right...I can't put my finger on it though. Perhaps you don't give men lacking one or two attributes you desire the right chance to prove that they are more than capable in other ways? Maybe your sandards are too high? I think maybe you're just subconciously scared of commitment after your previous relationship so you always find something wrong with men, like "Oh, well I'd totally comit to this guy, but hes married. Oh well." and finding other excuses so you feel like you're emotionally healthy, but in reality you're scared and want nothing to do with it. The lack of attraction to you over recent days and your reaction seems to support this sort of, but...eh. Like I said, I don't know shit about you crazy women so don't bother listening to me.