[FuckingRotter]

They're a funny bunch those French. They can't police their ports properly without our money. We had to put up fences for them in Calais.

Then this scallop business. What actually happened is the French government passed a law preventing French fishermen from fishing in their own waters at certain times of the year, whilst other EU member states fishermen can.

Quite understandably, the frogs are a bit upset when British boats turn up to pinch their scallops, quite legally. An exchange of smoke bombs and rocks took place. Can't really expect peace loving fishermen to hang around for that sort of abuse.

Any way, if the garlic munchers don't sort it out, we're sending in the Royal Navy.