He called it ‘perception’. I suppose one could use that word to describe the game we engaged in at the moment. I knew ‘word games’ when I heard them. I had played those games often enough. I considered myself smart enough to know when to speak up and when to shut up. Create the perception that I am eager to do any job assigned. Whatever Mr. Mayne’s angle was, I was not going to willingly set myself up. If he retained me, then I could plot my course from there. My only goal right now was to be kept on board. Quite a few had been fired on the spot when he came through in the first few days of buying IDS out. I thought for certain he would have kept the majority of his managers, afterall they knew the company from top to bottom. The rank and file seemed to stay intact from what a couple of my ‘inside sources’ told me. Most had pretty much abandoned me to my fate and even hoped I got my ‘just desserts’. There was no love lost on their part and no sympathy for anything that happened to me.
I will be the first to admit, I stepped on a few to get to the top—okay, I stepped on many. Most were gone. Some left of their own free will; others were removed if they proved problematic. It’s a funny thing when you think about it. If a man does it, everyone pats him on the back and he’s admired for his tenacity, boldness and resourcefulness. A woman does the same thing and she’s labeled a power hungry bitch. I didn’t care. I suppose the chickens were coming home to roost and the majority hoped I would get the boot.
“I…uh…suppose…regarding one’s perception, we see what we want to see. The trick I imagine is getting others to see things your way even when they don’t agree with it. As someone once said…’perception is subjective.’ I agree with that.” I wasn’t sure what he really meant or how this conversation tied into my quest to remain with the company. He said it was fortunate for ‘me’ that perception can be managed. I had done my share of shaping perception to suit my needs. So, maybe there was hope.
One of my girlfriends suggested I wear the sluttiest outfit I owned and play up my feminine charms. I stopped playing that little game a long time ago. First, I was no longer the little ingénue, struggling to make it. Second, I had been a CEO; I commanded respect and had people crawling to me. I had to maintain some sort of dignity. I was already groveling, I didn’t want to add boardroom whoring to the list. Judging from the way he regarded me, he wouldn’t fall for it anyway. I tried to maintain my poker face, yet he could probably feel the tension radiating from me. I remained seated, my hands clasped in a death grip as I waited for the verdict.
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