Things in porn that annoy you
 

(it would be a good idea to sticky this)

I'll freely admit I'm very picky when it comes to porn. I'm very particular about what I like and don't like to see.

Things common in porn that annoy me:

• Extreme genital closeups. I'm not a friggin' gynaecologist, I don't wanna see that shit.
• Fake whining in rape scenes. Bitch, please... either scream, beg or shut the hell up.
• Switching back and forth between ass, pussy and mouth. I don't mind seeing an chick take it in the rear (or even a guy for that matter), but geez, go for the ass LAST! Do they not know how unhygenic that is? Fucking gross.
• Lack of dialogue. Some pornographers just don't realize how important it is to set the mood. Give the actors some actual characters to play. Give those characters some meaning. There doesn't have to be a plot (although plot-driven is my favourite - I like to have a story to go with the sex), but it shouldn't just be mindless humping either.
  
  
  
  

So what annoys you?

One of the things I hate is when the girl is wearing hardly anything, I like to see her get everything taken off one by one.

The main thing that gets to me is in rape fantasy porn when the girl starts enjoying it... like wtf.

dude. high five.

I don't mean to sound like a feminist or anything, but it's kind of degrading to women to have the girl enjoying it on film. OK, so there have been stories here on RB where victims orgasm, but that's a purely biological reaction, nothing more. In the vids they're enjoying it completely, which besides defeating the purpose of the 'rape fantasy' label - to me - indicates that the writers think rape victims (real ones) are lying sluts who ask for it. Total lack of common sense.

I Hate the lack of set up.. And that goes for all porn not just rape porn. I completley realize the purpose of the material is to show a couple of people fucking, but jsut because the delivery boy brings a pizza is no reason to drop your pants :D

Give me a long drawn out scene. let me get to know the charecter,Who she is...then... Rape the shit out of her. I will enjoy the scene even more if I know the charecter involved

I actually agree with all of that but you forgot the MOST annoying thing in porn...(well, for me anyway)
Stupid music drowning out all the noises. At least it isn't as common as it used to be but some people still put that crap into their movies.

A few things that annoy me in porn, ridiculous fake orgasms and moaning, anyone seeming bored or like they're just there for the money, guys that are way too quiet/passive or who do nothing but pump their cocks in and out for 20min and people with nasty pimples :p

If I Were To Add A Few More....

• Girls Gladly Undressing, BJing, Fucking....in "First Time" Movies (At Least Show Some Sign of Fear or Embarassment Through Facial Expression Etc.)
• Lack of Actual Amateur Girls
• Poor Acting Skills of American Female Pornstars
• The Belief System That Somehow All Guys Prefer "Huge Tits"
• Interesting Scenes Skipped (From Intro, The Camera Gets Turned Off and Resumed When It Comes To The Fuck Scene)
• Horrible Quality
• Unable To See The Parts Viewer's Want To See (Due to Camera Angle and Zoom)
• Not Fucking All The Girls That Are Available On Scene
• In Incest and/or MILF Clips, Female Actress Is Always Chubby/Fat, and/or Has Disgusting Huge Tits and Dirty Genitals
• AND FINALLY THE MOST IMPORTANT OF ALL : Calling UGLY Girls "Hot & Sexy"

Yes I'm Very Strict As You Can See....:skull-big :skull-roc

I agree x1000000

OH I got another one.. How about when they film liek two minutes of an act.. like a blowjob or jsut the fucking.. and then they replay that in a loop.. like 15 or twenty times... whatsa matter did the guy blow his load too early? Or was the rest of the footage just not "good enough for porn" :D

HMM from the first 4 options i go for nr 1,2 and 3 :skull-thr unfortunatly you see one of these in most movies :skull-big :skull-big

I agree with everything Trill said, but- I'm gonna be the only one who says this one- I also hate fucking cumshots. I own plenty of sperm of my own and I carry it everywhere I go. It has never turned me on, so why oh why, do I wanna pay to see someone else's??? It's as big a turn on to me as a big throaty hocker (in my mind there's someone reading this stroking himself madly at the idea of chunky throat mucus now... :eek: ... to each his own, I guess).

For me, sperm has no place in my porn. I want it down the bitches throat where God intended it to reside.

Actually, you're not alone on that; I'm not fond of moneyshots either.

Freaking eyes on the Camera!
 

The girl giving a blow job that keeps staring at the fucking camera? WTF

Hmmmm is this a good angle(move head) or this is better?? Who fucking cares dear...you got a cock in your mouth....they arent thinking how pretty you look? Give me a damn break!:p :p ;)

LOL!!!!!! Like she's thinking "Nevermind the cock in my mouth... I'm a movie star" :skull-big :skull-big :skull-big

OK !! LOL

well as far as most normal porn goes - I HATE THE FUCKING JAPANESE CENSORSHIP !

In fact even in other countries there is cencorship and this IS THE NUMBER ONE THING THAT NOT ONLY ANNOYS ME BUT MAKES ME FEEL LIKE MURDERING SOMEBODY !! WE ARE ADULTS AND WE KNOW WHAT A PUSSY LOOKS LIKE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :mad: :mad: :mad:

the number two thing is - fucking music WHY THE FUCK DO I WANT TO HEAR SUPERMARKET SHOPPING MUSIC WHILE I AM WATCHING A HOT CHICK TAKE IT IN THE ASS :mad: :mad: :mad: AM I SUPPOSED TO DANCE WHILE JERKING OFF ??:skull-ide

The number three most annoying thing is focusing on the face of THE GUY AS HE CUMS ??? MAN WHAT THE FUCK IS THE CAMERAMAN THINKING ?? - do you know how totally off-putting to my wank this is ?? GRRRRR ! :mad:

the number four most annoying thing is when the chick is not undressed at all especially when she is gettin fucked with her BRA ON !! OH MY LORD ARE YOU FUCKING CRAZY ?? I WANT TO SEE THE BITCHES TITS !!!!!!!!!! I WANNA SEE HER TOTALLY UNDRESSED !:mad:

the number 5 most annoying thing in porn is when both parties are perfect cardboard cutouts and then end up fucking each other like they both pieces of wood ! this is what i call zombie-fucking - the girl might as well be checking her nails while he is in hner pussy etc... SO ANNOYING !!

These are the five most annoying but i also agree with most of what has already been said too long bj's, fake moaning etc etc .. :D

LMFAO!!!!!! MD!!! I agree 100% with everything..... except,



for me that's one of the best parts :D :D :D

lol SO ! i hear ya !!

When they make out that a girl is supposed to be an innocent victim but she has tattoos and piercings in certain areas that just cries out PORN STAR.
If she's good looking then I can overlook it :D but it really doesn't go with the storyline so it kind of ruins the illusion.

Hahaha, I could certainly do without it too.

does anyone else agree that girl on girl is no fun to watch? They cant go down nearly as good as the man can. You would think that the girls would know how to do it right, but they dont get in there and clean it out like the male actors...anyone else agree?

that it's not me in the movie being violated somehow

when they show too much of the guy, not enough of the girl or fuck action going on

Got to agree in the shitty music in porno, well music period.

When I direct my rape epic, there will be:

1. No socks left on past the initial stripping and ripping stage.
2. Georgeous women and normal to ugly looking men.
3. A proper, logical and believeable script focusing of the psyhological and phyisical aspects of the theme.
4. Enough threads removed in the women's clothing by the wardrobe department that will allow the actors to properly tear them off without stalling a scene for minutes while they fumble, tug and meet their match with a pair of panties as the actress goes numb during the process.
5. No mosaics.
6. No women with the uncontrolable urge to smile, laugh or assist in any way.
7. Temperature controlled sets with the temperature high enough to prevent breath from showing on camera, but low enough to insure erect female nipples.
8. Women without tatoos.
9. No softcore, no censorship and no extreme genital close ups.
10. More female facial closeups, particularly upon entry and male climax.
11. No musical score, except for what may be playing in the normal backround of the scene.
12. No actresses that start enjoying the scene more than the actor after 3 minutes.
13. AIDs and STD testing just prior to filming and no condoms.
14 Professional grade equipment (cameras and lighting) without shadows of the guy with the hand held mini-camera.

All I need it 2.5 million dollars and filming can start in 60 days with a completed classsic product in another 90 days.

Send cash of money order in the sum of $19.95 to...


:skull-bee :skull-big :skull-bee

How to do a porn movei see either of the PIRATES films by Digital Playground I mean great story, gorgeous women, special effects that are good for a porn movie and hot sex plus nice humor. And the sequel is better than the first film.

How not to do the opposite.

If there is rape in a movie come on folks at least make it realistic and well acted.

Like I've said before

HRH you are FUCKING AWESOME

Looking at you I pull out my magic sword of castration -

I do not agree!

(looks at you with menacing intent) :skull-mad

But it depends on how good the actresses are.

I like how you put it :skull-thu:skull-thu:skull-thu:skull-thu:skull-thu
I only like it if the girl is got a strap on for the other girl.:skull-thu
butt, I like girls with girls & girls with guys, shit, I just like girls

when I use to rent porn vids on vhs tapes & have to wind forward to the parts I wanted to see.

(that shows my age) :D

Piss poor lighting and directing

a lot of italian flicks are so frig-gin dark you cant see the action

and a good example of directing and lighting is the Krista/kass babysitter flick

good bit of pounding etc but when it comes to the classic krista money shot where she drools out or spits the goo the dam camera man is looking over the mans back with the lighting reflecting off the back instead of her face.

so the whole flick is not the master piece it could have been

pisses me off

I don't watch much porn. However, at the risk of offending half of the board, I would probably watch more porn if it wasn't all so fake.

For instance.. you have your bestiality porn. Now these girls have sex with a dog. If it isn't digitally edited and they actually on camera have some part of the dog inside of them, then it is real.

Yet incest porn is a random guy sleeping with a random girl and she may call him "daddy" or "brother" but in most cases I saw doesn't even do that. It never lives up to the "big brother catches little sister masturbating and shows her how to do it right" billing that the words put into your head. You could imagine a more arousing scene from that than what is played out.

I guess its not porn but the laws and legalities of it all, but if this is the case I don't see how they can make bestiality movies (which I've never watched so perhaps they aren't as real as I think).

I think that's the problem, with a few notable exceptions, even porn advertised as real **** would have to be taken with a pinch of salt.

The problem I have is when it promises so much, but then doesn't deliver. That, and when they label porn as 'art'.

Have to agree with the blowjob comment, that goes for any act. They spend too much time on each part.

The most arousing sex in porn is homemade movies. Its real. Real people having real sex. But the manufactured stuff really doesn't do much for me personally beside the story scenario which the homemade lacks.

The stories of the big production movies + the action of homemade movies would be more appealing, especially to women.

what the amatuer stuff you find...actually I'll have to agree with you there, something, almost, I don't know, dirty, voyueristic, like you are spying on someone without them knowing.

Amatuer is RIGHT !:skull-thu

I hate that big fake tits, two inch makeup job on her face fake shit.:skull-mad
I like the natural looking females

Oh doggy, make you right on the tits, while I don't mind if they have a had some kind of boob job, I find the extreme increases, you know the ones where it looks like a couple of balloons have been put under the skin, a major turn off.

My next Old Age Pension cheque is yours. :skull-big